In Defense of Crocs...

Hello, my name is Larry, and I'm a Croc wearer... (in unison "hello, Larry")


When I bought my new house about a year ago, I was ecstatic to find that the original hardwood floors (circa 1940) were buried beneath the light bluish/cat urine stain colored carpet.  I hired a company to refinish them in an elegant, yet manly shade called "Gun Stock".  I could NOT wait to re-enact the scene from "Risky Business" in which Tom Cruise comes sliding across the floor in his socks and underwear lipsinking to "Old Time Rock 'n Roll" (except I would be wearing boxers, not those other things...).  It wasn't until a few "takes" later that I realized a some problems...


1. I weighed 245 lbs* at the time, and walking around barefoot and or in socks on a hard floor all day isn't good for the ol' dogs... It makes them hurt!
2. Wearing white socks on h.w. floors in a town where dust infiltrates everything makes said socks look like they were on the feet of a Vietnam Army soldier after a day in the bush.


Thus began my journey to locate my very first pair of house shoes...


I went everywhere I could think of... Dillard's, Gap, Wal-Mart, Target, American Eagle, JC Penny, etc.  I tried every brand of house shoe made of every material for +/- 50 square miles... During my journey, I passed by at least three racks of multi-colored (e.g. blue, black, camo., orange, etc.) Crocs.  You would of thought they had the plague.


However, I, like most people I'm assuming, had never tried on a single one of these for some reason socially un-acceptable, anti-lady getting clogs...  


Once I finally gave up my search for "real" house shoes, and during the exit from the mall, I passed by the rack of Crocs in Dillard's once more...  After taking a few 360 degree glances around the shoe department, and awkwardly roaming aimlessly, pretending to look for something else, I gave in to my desperation and grabbed the first pair of men's size 11 Crocs that I could find... 


What was this?!  Suddenly all the jokes I had heard, the social puns concerning what "type" of people wear Crocs, the fear of rejection by every person I knew, all completely disappeared...  Crocs were not just comfortable, they were light, my feet could breathe...  It was like walking on clouds!


Needless to say, they came home with me.  As I type, the same pair of size 11, khaki colored Crocs I awkwardly shoved onto my feet some twelve months ago, sit confidently in the open, right next to my bed, as they have since that fearful day in Dillard's.  I don't mind at all that I'm made fun of constantly, for those who bully the idea of Crocs have never experienced their amazing glory!

I say it proudly, one more time...

Hello, my name is Larry, and I'm a Croc wearer, and I would encourage you to slip a pair on before you consider giggling at you doctor the next time he squeaks away in his favorite work shoes.

For all you Croc wearers out there... Let us unite and break free from the social oppression cast upon us by those who do not only not wear Crocs, but have never even had the pleasure of putting a pair on!

Happy Croc-ing.

-L


*As of today, I have lost about 20 pounds since I started wearing Crocs (un-related).